Being in a relationship is like a test; a test of how you treat yourself and how
you treat others with whom you are intimate. There are three essential elements;
you, your partner, and the feelings/energy/spirit between you. Therefore you must
take care of yourself,
An estimated 5.2 million adults have occurring
mental health and addiction disorders. Of adults using
homeless services,
thirty-one percent reported having a combination of these conditions.
David E. Myers, Ph.D
Clinical Psychologist
2112 11th Ave South, Ste 340
Birmingham, AL 35205
(205) 251-8808
nurture the relationship in a balanced way while asking your
partner to do the same. For me, this is a wonderful growing
experience with a number of challenges. When relationships
are not working, couples either seek out individual help so
that they can nurture themselves or they might focus on the
dynamics of the relationship.
My couples work is both similar and different from individual
work. It is similar in that I would like to hear the stories of both
partners, how they both have established relationship/intimacy
patterns, and how they might use these patterns to nurture the
relationship as well as the partner. Individual work may or may
not aim for this as there might be a need for tighter boundaries.
My general aim is to preserve relationships and at the same
time, look at the possible consequences of preserving the
relationship for both partners.
This process does overlap individual work by looking at
nurturance of fondness and admiration, communication
patterns, mutual influencing, solving problems, and creating
shared meaning. Of course, being in relationship will bring up
issues that you may not be aware of while out of a relationship.
This work is most successful when both partners understand
that they both have unresolved issues, both want to be
response-able, and both see a positive outcome for the work.
There are some cases, however, where one person carries
most of the responsibility for the relationship conflict.